Defining Terms

Disappointment

It occurred to me a few weeks ago that one of the biggest disappointments of my life is that I am not the best. At some point, I’m not sure when, I realized that there is nothing at which I am the absolute leader. I am not the most intelligent, not the fastest, not the strongest, not the most popular, not the funniest, not the purest, not the most artistic, not the most creative, not the most disciplined, not the most humble.

I am normal. I am one of many. I am not the pinnacle.

There was a time when I thought there must be something at which my ability is unprecedented, something I could do better than any other person who has ever lived, but I have learned that there is not. And this knowledge is crushing.

More proof that I’m just a typical male.